It's Five Minutes Later Than it Was Five Minutes Ago.

Remember the comic strip Calvin and Hobbes? One of my favorites was set in August and Hobbes is watching Calvin running around franticly. While Calvin is running around he is talking to himself. Saying things like August? Where did June and July go? Summer is almost over! I must have more fun! Play outside more! Argh…. it’s five minutes later than it was five minutes ago! As crazy as it sounds I have to say I feel a little bit like Calvin.

Jeff and I are looking forward to parenthood and want nothing more than to begin that part of our journey. However, there is a Calvin part of me running around worried. Worried that I have not read enough books on parenting. Worried that we should know more. Worried that I did not cherish the time we have had without kids enough. Which then fuels my Calvin brain to worry that we did not do all the things we were suppose to do. I am not even sure what those things are but the Calvin part of me wants to make sure there is a part of my brain that is dedicating to worrying about it. Clearly, only a type A perfectionist would want to make sure no thought was left unworried over. : )

I have mused a lot about waiting in many of my previous posts, just click on waiting to see all of them. I think what got the Calvin part of me worrying is the fear that I have not waited well. Not that my waiting is over, by any stretch of the imagination. But a part of my waiting journey is over and it brought about a reality a check. As I have said before waiting is a gift. I know that sounds crazy because while we are waiting all we want, is to be done with the waiting. We want what we are waiting for and we don’t want to have to wait anymore.

However, I have been reminded that the time while we are waiting is something that we can never get back and there are no do over’s. That time, is one of the gifts of waiting.

So as I move forward to the next part of my wait, in what I affectionately call my adoptwaiting. I am reminded that I want to wait well. I want to try, the key word being try, to view the time I have been given to wait not as an enemy of something I just need to get through, but as a gift of something to be enjoyed because once it’s gone I can’t get back.